September 3, 2008

It’s been almost a week since I’ve updated. With fall tv season starting, becoming more involved in my social groups, and cleaning and organizing my house I’ve been really busy. I cleaned out Jacob’s closet and have a huge gathering of items by my door that I either need to sell or give away. I also rearranged things around my house to better use the space. I think once my house gets organized I will be able to spend more time on things that I’d like to do like blogging, scrapbooking, and reading. And working out, too. It’s been a while since I’ve gone to the gym.

Today was a great day. Sinisa had a day off so I got a chance to spend some time with him and also work on things that I normally wouldn’t be able to do while watching Jacob. He also had some time to build a bookshelf for all my parenting books so I could keep them all in one place. I’m looking forward to just relaxing for a couple of hours with him before going to bed at a decently early hour (yes, 11/11:30 is early for me).

Tomorrow is my first MOPS meeting. I’m excited to see what it’s all about. In the afternoon I have a dentist appointment. I’m hoping I can just get a normal cleaning which is $50 and don’t need a deep cleaning which is over $600. My insurance doesn’t pay for either of them so I’d rather pay as little as possible out of pocket. I hate going to the dentist…

Today’s Challenge: When was the last time you saw the dentist? If it’s been a while, schedule yourself an appointment.

August 28, 2008

So it’s been a month since I “officially” started my 300 in 3 years list. I am proud to say that I have accomplished 19 of the 300 tasks and am currently working on a lot more. I credit my success with looking at my list everyday so that I keep my goals in mind.

Today was also the day that Obama became the “official” candidate for the Democrats. Obama seems like a nice guy and I think it is wonderful that MLK’s dream is finally coming true and a black man *may* be president. I really don’t care for either candidate but vote pro-life, so normally republican. What I read in a blog last night though changed how I viewed Obama. Go to Jillstanek.com and look at August 27th posts. Then go to factcheck.org and verify it. Obama had the chance, as a senator, to support the “born alive” bills and he did not… twice! I’m going to research this more over the next couple days.

Today’s Challenge: Do you really know what the candidates believe? If you are going to vote in this election (which I hope you are), you should know where each candidate stands on the issues.

August 26, 2008

I decided today that I have entirely too much junk. I am a “pack-rat” and always keep things because I might need them some day. Jacob’s closet has been being used as a storage closet for various toys and items that I want to keep but don’t know what to do with. I finally took most of the items out today and created a big pile by my desk of items to give away or sell. Jacob will finally have a closet for all his clothes and I won’t have to have stacks of bins in his room which is nice because it kind of looked tacky. Plus I figured that I should pull the large toys out because he will be playing with them soon enough and I want to clean them before he does. Poor Sinisa, when he comes home he is going to have to navigate his way around our apartment. I seriously have considered getting a storage space or renting a garage to have a place for all my stuff. Next Friday I am babysitting two children here at my apartment so I have until then to clean everything up and organize it. Giving myself a deadline will hopefully ensure that it gets done but may just mean I find a hiding spot for it.

Today’s challenge: Join your local Freecycle if you haven’t already.

August 23, 2008

I haven’t been on the computer much these past few days. I have really tried spending my time on “real life” activities. I’ve spent time with family, started making new friends, and worked on projects around my house. One thing I’ve realized is that I’m not going to miss anything important while I’m away from my computer (with the exception of my email because I did miss out on a free travel swing for Jacob because I did not see an email in time). If I don’t read my RSS feeder though, I might miss someone’s insight on life or a funny story but I am not going to look back on that time and wish that I had been on that website instead of spending time with my son. If I don’t check my facebook ten times a day I might miss out on a friend’s pictures or an update on what a friend is doing at that exact moment but I won’t look back on that time and wish that I had been online instead of spending time with my fiance. And if I don’t update this blog every night I might not get as many hits to my site as I would like but I won’t look back on this time and think that I should have been updating my blog with my day to day comings and goings instead of living the life that I would one day like to write about. At the end of the day I am doing what I should be doing…. living.

August 19, 2008

Lots of things going on lately… This is just a short update because I am feeling like crap (allergies and a cold).

-Jacob slept from 7:40pm-6:20am last night. He did not wake up once so I was very grateful for that.

-I had the worst experience at a dentist ever! When I scheduled the appointment I asked them if they took my insurance and they said yes. Then I confirmed that they took it for adults (and told the lady I was 25) because I had called other places and they took my insurance but only for children. She said yes. So I drive all the way to another town for this appointment. I can’t find the building and when I finally do I get in a chair soon after filling out paperwork. I get x-rays taken of my mouth and the dentist looks in my mouth. He confirms what I already know: I need two root canals. He then says my insurance will pay for the front root canal but they won’t pay for a cap so I’d be walking around with a giant hole between my front two teeth. He also says that my insurance won’t pay for the root canal for the back teeth but they will pay to get it pulled. Ok. I can deal with all that. Then he tells me that a cleaning is $50 and my insurance will not pay for it. Great. So I came all the way down there, dealt with a rude dentist (didn’t tell you the story of how he laughed at me), and couldn’t even get my teeth cleaned. Great. What a waste of time.

-I picked up a garbage bag full of free clothes last night. They are really cute. I’m trying to find 9 month clothes but am not having much luck. Just a couple of items in the bag were 9 months.

-I went to Starbucks this morning with the mother’s of infants group. I had a caramel frappucino and it was soooo good. I enjoyed talking to the other moms and it was nice to be reassured that I’m not doing everything wrong when it comes to raising my child (which is how I feel sometimes).

-My scrapbook area is almost set up. I have the chest emptied of toys and most of the scrapbook supplies organized. I am discovering items I didn’t know I had so I am really looking forward to making these scrapbooks.

-I was thinking last night about why I always put off doing things that are important. I realized that it is always because of two reasons. The first reason is that the task takes more than one step or could possibly take a long time. I don’t like starting things I can’t finish at that moment so I put it off until I feel I will have more time (as a mom time is never in abundance so these tasks get pushed off continuously). This happens a lot with phone calls I need to make. I want to call old friends and family I haven’t talk to in a while but then I feel like I need big blocks of time in which to do so because I don’t want to call and then have to hang up because my son woke up or I have to leave. The second reason is that I don’t want to mess up or not complete the task perfectly. I worry so much about doing something just right that I put it off until I feel I can do it correctly, which normally results in having to finish the task quickly because I have a deadline of some sort. The most recent example of this is my thank you cards. These should have been completed a long time ago but I never feel like I can write just “thanks for coming and thanks for the gift”. I get such anxiety over what I’m going to write that I put it off until I have to do it because I am going to see the person. I still have yet to write thank yous to the two people who have done the most for me and Jacob because I can’t figure out how to let them know how important they are to us, but yet I know that by putting it off it only hurts them. The completion of important tasks is something that I am really going to work hard on these next couple of weeks.

-As I wrote this post my son woke up twice. I guess he thought he was too nice by sleeping through the night last night….

Today’s challenge: Get some sleep! (and take some for me too)

August 17, 2008

I failed. I did not get everything done on my list. I did, however, succeed. How do you fail and succeed at the same time you might ask. Well I might not have accomplished everything on my list but the fact that I even finished one project, instead of sitting around watching TV and playing on the computer, shows growth in this procrastinator. I ran some errands, washed and put away all Jacob’s laundry, cleaned up the nursery, almost finished setting up my scrapbook area, cleaned out a file cabinet, organized all of S’s paperwork, vacuumed, and put the rest of Jacob’s older clothes in bins by size. I also spent time with my son, my fiance, my sister in law, my nephew, and my mom. I guess looking back I did do quite a lot. I think that I make unrealistic expectations as to what I can get done each day. I always wish each day had even just one more hour. Why can’t we have 25 hour days? Then again if we had 25 hour days I would want 26 hour days.

Today’s challenge: Look at your to-do list… Are you planning for a 24 hour day or a 25 hour one?

August 15, 2008

Yesterday I went to a “mom’s of infants” group and was so excited to meet other moms that had babies. I joined the group because I am trying to get out more often and I want Jacob to get used to being around other children. Not only did I leave my house to go to the group, I made an even bigger step by going alone (well obviously I brought Jacob). In the past I would never have went anywhere alone so I can see myself growing in that aspect.

Tomorrow I am going to an annual yard sale that helps raise money for the homeless. I’ve gone in the past and found wonderful things. I am going, list in hand, and have decided I’m only going to buy things that I am looking for. After this I am going home childless because my sister-in-law is taking Jacob overnight. (Thanks again Jen!)

I am looking forward to accomplishing as much, if not more, than I did last weekend (wow it seems like my last time alone was a lot longer than a week ago…). On the list of things to do between Saturday afternoon and Sunday afternoon: go to Target, go to Hobby Lobby, empty out car and wash it by hand, wash and put away all laundry, rearrange furniture in nursery, dye my hair, put together a shelving unit, setup my scrapbook area, finish baby announcements/thank you’s and send out, vacuum, put pictures in frames, find and print out a living will form online, empty contents of one file cabinet into a box to sort at a later date, compile week’s menu plan and grocery list, packup Jacob’s clothes, clean kitchen/wash bottles, rearrange my 300 list, and lastly blog about my 24 hours of accomplishments. (Congratulations if you read that entire list) I listed these things because I am hoping reporting on what I have done at the end of the time will push me to work harder. I probably won’t post tomorrow night because I want to spend as much time as possible working towards my goal but I might post an update, we’ll see.

Today’s Challenge: Choose one thing you have been putting off and do it! It will feel so good to cross it off your list of to-do’s.

August 13, 2008

(*This was entered as a page yesterday accidentally…)

I cooked today for the first time in a couple of years (other than something in a box, can, or bag). It wasn’t much but the fact that I went into the kitchen with the intent on making anything is a huge step for me. I have always considered the kitchen to be my least favorite area in my house because it seems to get messy so quickly and I don’t think that I’m a very good cook. What did I venture in the kitchen to make, you ask? Zucchini. I know…I know… It wasn’t a meal but I have to work up to that. I cut the zucchini in half lengthwise and added salt, pepper, and parmesan cheese. I broiled it for about 15 minutes. It was so good. My dad had given me the zucchini a couple of weeks ago and it had been sitting in the fridge because I did not know how to make it. My dad has a great recipe but I didn’t have any salsa so I couldn’t make it. I hope this will be the first of many adventures into the kitchen for me. I looked at a cookbook today and found a lot of great foods that seemed easy enough to make and I can’t wait to try them out. (If you are wondering if I always eat out- the answer is no. I just have a wonderful fiance who after work comes home and cooks me delicious meals.)

Today I was watching a recording of the Oprah show and it was about the health care industry. She was talking about Michael Moore’s movie “Sicko”. Though I am not a fan of Michael Moore, this movie sounds interesting. It’s sad to hear stories of people who die because they can’t afford the treatments that they need after their insurance companies deny them. And then Oprah said that treating cancer can be around “600 thousand dollars” and some insurances have a “150 thousand dollar” cap. $150,000 sounds like a lot until you look at what that amount will get you if you become ill. I was amazed and I think you will be, too. I plan on trying to rent this movie or find a copy of it somewhere.

Today’s Challenge: Look at your health insurance policy. How much coverage do you really have? If you get sick will they pay a portion of the bill, all of it, or none at all?

August 12, 2008

I finally figured out what is going on with my whole job situation… I am now officially a stay at home mom! My maternity leave was set to end tomorrow but my new availability does not work for them so I had to quit. I am still unsure as to how I feel about this whole situation. I’ve wanted to be a SAHM for as long as I can remember. When asked what I wanted to be when I grew up I would occasionally say things like “a teacher” or “a writer” because you couldn’t study for a career as “a mom”. I never thought I would actually be able to be a stay at home mom and even throughout my pregnancy and since I had Jacob had assumed I would be returning to work. It will be hard to say goodbye to the wonderful people I’ve worked with and goodbye to the colorful conversations we had, but it is what I have to do.

Today I worked towards meeting my goal of becoming involved in “mom” groups. I went to a park play date with Jacob, Jennifer, and Camden. We got there early and nobody was there so we waited and waited and nobody showed up! I was disappointed because I did not get to meet anyone but proud of myself that I had made the effort to go. The old me would have stayed home. As for my other goals: today I finished a Nora Robert’s book and the crossword puzzle I had been working on. I started a sudoku book and tasted a snack item from another country that I had never had before. I also started working on cleaning/organizing my room. That is going to be a very long process. Tomorrow I’m looking forward to eating the papaya that S bought for me, spending a day at home with Jacob, reading the posts in my RSS feeder (481 and counting), and going through my books to see if there are any I’d like to donate.

Today’s Challenge: Make a list of your goals. It could be five or fifty or five hundred. What is it that you want to complete this month or this year or over the next 60 years? They can be little, they can be big. What would make you happy and fulfilled? Take as long as you need for this challenge. If you write down your goals there is a better chance that you will complete them. Please feel free to put a link to your post in the comment section. I’d love to read them :)

August 11, 2008

Yesterday was a very busy day for me so I didn’t post anything. I had picked Jacob up from my mom’s after a relaxing morning spent with the man I love. My mom told me that Jacob had slept through the night. I was so proud of him and happy that we would be getting some relief from middle of the night feedings (well, his dad would since he wakes up with him- I know I’m spoiled). After I picked up Jacob we went to my Aunt’s house and spent the whole day with extended family. My cousin was in town with her two girls. They are two and four years old and this was the first time I was meeting them. They were so cute in their matching outfits- definitely something I plan on doing when I have multiple children. I was never close with my cousins like some people are but now that my oldest cousin and I both have children we have something in common. I found it easier to talk to her because of this. She gave Jacob an adorable bedding set with jungle animals on it and it will be great to use in the crib (which is currently sitting half finished in the middle of his room).

Once we got home from my Aunt’s I played with Jacob a little and put him to bed. He slept through the night again. I normally put him in his swing between 8 and 9pm and then when he was waking up between 12 and 2am we would take him out and, after feeding him, place him in his bassinet for the rest of the night. I found that at night he was so tired that he was not happy anywhere other than his swing. Tonight I decided I wanted to break him of this habit so I put him in his pack-n-play which is in his room. It took him an hour and ten minutes (and multiple times of me going in there to put the pacifier back in his mouth) before he fell asleep. I hope that he sleeps as well tonight as he has been.

Ok, enough about my son. I could go on and on and tell you everything about his day from his smiles to the toys he played with but I will spare you :) Instead I will tell you all about our stroller fitness class today. I went to the class with my sister-in-law and nephew with the idea of meeting new people and getting in some exercise. I was not prepared for the high intensity workout that was to come. I was exhausted half way into it and was amazed at the other moms who were doing the workout with ease. They assured my sil and I that we were doing great and that everyone had a hard time at first. Watching them I did not believe that they could ever have been as uncoordinated and out of shape as I was. (Though, to make myself feel better, I decided that this was because I had just given birth a couple of months before. I would not admit that I would have been just as lost pre-pregnancy as I was post.)

After we finished up with the class the instructor reminded us that this was a free trial class and asked if we had the pricing list. We of course didn’t and I assumed it was because they want to get you excited about the class before showing you how expensive it was. I assumed correctly. It was $50 a month. That is twice as much as my gym membership. I laughed when I saw it (in my head of course because I didn’t want to be rude). As soon as Jennifer (my sil) and I were out of earshot we quickly decided that there was no way in hell we were going to pay that price. We could meet on our own to push our strollers and buy $5 bands at the store to workout our muscles. Or I could just go to the gym and put my monthly membership to use.

Today’s Challenge: Call one person you haven’t talked to in a while.

August 9, 2008

At 4:45am I was awake with Jacob and desperately wanting to crawl back into bed. At around 6 I was not just wanting to return to bed; I was wanting to stay there. By that time Jacob had fallen asleep and woken up about four times and each time he had done so after I returned to bed. The day seemed to improve when I actually was able to rest for a couple more hours. I then enjoyed playing with Jacob. We sang and danced, played with toys, and looked at all the colors on his mobile while it spun around. He also enjoyed time in his swing. Aunt Jennifer came over to spend time with mommy and Jacob. Then everyone went to Starbucks to meet Grandma Kelly. Jacob slept at the beginning but then woke up just in time to see mommy spill coffee all over. He was not very happy that he had to wait to eat while everyone cleaned coffee off themselves. After that Jacob went to stay with his grandma. Mommy and Auntie then got to spend some time “baby free” and remembered what it felt like to be “women” instead of “moms”. We started off getting pedicures (my treat for Jen’s birthday). It was so nice to be pampered. We then went to Subway to eat and Walgreens to pick up some essentials (and some things that were on clearance). After saying goodbye to Jennifer I walked up to my apartment and was thankful that I didn’t have to lug a heavy carseat and diaper bag up the stair with me (three flights of them!) I then wrote a list of tasks that I wanted to get accomplished this evening and set about doing them. I’m going to brag a little because I am so proud of myself… In three hours I managed to: do four loads of laundry, clean my closet, put clothes away, do a load of dishes, wash a sinkful of bottles, read all blogs in my RSS reader, e-mail three people, update facebook, go through some junk mail, read three chapters in the Bible, put away everything I bought at Walgreens, and read a chapter of the Nora Roberts’ book I am reading. I love when I set goals for myself and meet them. Tomorrow I hope to: write the rest of my thank you’s and birth announcements, wash two loads of towels, vacuum my apartment, dye my hair (brown this time), cleanout my e-mail inbox, go to the gym, visit family, and setup my scrapbook area. A lot to do but hopefully I will get a majority of it done before I pick up my son at two. Now I am off to spend time with my fabulous fiance and enjoy a night alone… reminds me of when we were dating :)

Today’s challenge: Do something nice for yourself- get a manicure, buy the shirt you have been wanting, spend some time outside in the sun… whatever it is that YOU want to do! Enjoy your Sunday.

August 7, 2008

I’ve been trying to spend less time on the computer and more time with my family and working towards my goals. Up until now I have been thinking of maternity leave as a vacation, knowing I would have to return to work. Recently though, I realized that my maternity leave may become my life for the next few years. It’s looking more and more like I am going to be a stay at home mom because my part-time availability won’t work for my job. I will find out for sure tomorrow. It will be sad to leave all of the wonderful people that I work with but it will be wonderful to watch my son grow up. I decided that if I’m staying at home I need to come up with daily plans for myself so that I don’t just waste the days away. I want to find new ways to entertain Jacob and continue to learn more about childcare and best practices for things like learning two languages, potty training, and any other topics that may come up as he grows. I want to spend more time with my family than I have in the past. I hope to keep busy and enrich my personal life with mom’s groups, hobbies (writing, reading, scrapbooking), fall tv shows (so many I can’t even begin to list my faves), and achieving all of my goals. I think this will be a positive experience for me. Please understand if I don’t post everyday. I am still trying to figure out how this all will work but am excited about sharing my journey with everyone.

August 5, 2008

Looking back at my post yesterday I realized I did not share the biggest news of the day…. my son was two months old!!! (bad mommy!) I can’t believe that I gave birth to him that long ago. I wrote him a letter last night telling him all of the new things he had started doing over the past month (smiling, noticing toys, and um, headbutting). I am so proud of him each day like I guess all parents are. OH and you will never believe what I did today… I hurt my child! Physically hurt him! It was an accident and I ended up crying more than he did. See he woke up this morning with a huge scratch right in between his eyes because his nails were long because someone (that would be me) is afraid that I will get some of his skin in the clippers. So I decided I could not wait any longer because he was getting his picture taken today and I didn’t want him to scratch up his face even more. I clipped one nail, then two, then three, then four and ahhhhhhhh!!!! clipped some of his skin. His face, the look was what made me feel the worst. It was like “how could you do this to me mommy?” And then the blood. Just the tiniest bit but I had made my child bleed. He’s fine now thank God. I know he won’t remember the time when mommy got his skin in the nail clippers but I still felt bad.

Tonight I went on a date with my wonderful fiance ( I actually got to use one of my 50 million cute purses). I had received a gift card to Chilis for my birthday (thanks to my mil) so we decided to use it. The food was so good. It was nice spending time with him. In other relationship news, we are starting the “21 Day Complaint Free Marriage Experiment” (www.simplemarriage.net -sorry I’m new to blogging and don’t know how to make this clickable so you are just going to need to copy and paste). As much as my fiance does for me I know I still find things to complain about so hopefully this experiment will remind me to keep my words positive.

Other than starting that experiment, today was my first day of my competition with my sister in law to see who can lose the most weight in three months. I had debated about putting my weight on here for everyone to see but screw it… please keep in mind I just had a baby… and don’t laugh when I tell you… 173.8. Wow I can’t believe I just wrote this down and am going to publish this. Anways, back to what I was saying. Yes, that’s how much I weigh and I haven’t yet determined how much I want to lose per week. I don’t even know what’s healthy and realistic to lose. I think I started today off ok. I didn’t exercise because I wanted to spend as much time with my family as possible (my man works two jobs and it’s been over a month since he’d had a day off). Today I have had: ham sandwich with mustard and cheese, crispy chicken salad, two rootbeers, one strawberry daiquri (yum), and a cup of chocolate skim milk. Oh and I had half a scoop of vanilla ice cream, almost forgot that. My food choices weren’t the best but on the positive side, I didn’t snack on anything.

Today’s challenge: Remind your partner of one thing that makes them fantastic. If you are single then tell a family member/roommate one thing that makes them great. :) Have a wonderful day!

August 4, 2008

So I am a week into my quest to improve myself and am doing great with my list of goals. I have completed two items so far (play the lottery and go out for ice cream). They are little but it feels great to cross them off. I have started many of the other items. I am reviewing my list each evening to see what I have done that day and to come up with some ideas of what I would like to do the next day. This method is working quite well for me. I would like to point out that, while I made this list in a couple days, I have given myself three years to complete it. I will not change overnight nor will I fully develop in the next three years. I am a work in progress and I hope everyone will give me the opportunity to grow and evolve into the person I’d like to be.

I’m so excited to be starting towards one of my bigger goals tomorrow. I set a goal to lose 50 pounds in three years. I recently had a child and I put on 50 pounds during this pregnancy. I have already lost about 25 through having the baby, breastfeeding, and being in the hospital (twice) where the food was not appetizing. I figure if I lose 50 more pounds I will be around the size I was when I left college. This past week has been filled with many bad food choices (among them-oreos) and only one trip to the gym. I hope to improve my eating habits and go to the gym 3/4 times a week. All this being said, I’m starting towards the goal tomorrow because my sister-in-law and I are having a contest to see who can lose the most weight in the next three months. There is no prize except for the satisfaction of competition and winning. I think this is what we both need to motivate ourselves and move us towards our fitness goals. We start in the morning when we will each weigh ourselves. I have yet to decide how I will update my progress because y’all know I am not going to put my weight up here. It’s downright embarrassing that I’ve gained all this weight and the fact that I am going to lose it does not change the fact that it’s here now.

Oooh and I’ve also decided that I’m going to have a daily goal for everyone to complete. Today’s goal is think of ten things that you are thankful for and list them in the comment section.

My ten:

1) family

2) friends

3) oreos

4) lists

5) candles during a storm

6) my digital camera (thanks mom and Jen!)

7) my son’s smile

8) the internet

9) cute stationary to write letters on

10) anyone who reads this blog!!!

August 2, 2008

I didn’t post last night because I decided to spend some time with my family and watch an episode of Criminal Minds (seriously love that show). Yesterday I went to lunch with my grandma and then talked with her and my grandpa. I really enjoyed this time. I realized how old my grandparents were getting as I sat across the table from my grandma and looked at her “life” lines (aka wrinkles). I have never had a close relationship with them and, even though I live about 20 minutes from them, normally only see them on Holidays. I went out to visit them because instead of sending money for my birthday my grandma wanted to take me out to lunch so she could see the new addition to our family. I had been meaning to call her and set up a time to visit for the previous month but can never motivate myself to pickup the phone, always putting it on tomorrow’s “to-do” list. So anyways, I was talking with them and it was funny to hear all their stories. My grandparents said they used to pay fifty cents an hour to their babysitter. And then my grandpa was saying how when he was in college he made $7 a week. I couldn’t believe how much times had changed. It was nice visiting with them and I decided to make an effort to visit them more because I don’t want to regret not taking the time to see them later.

Today was a great day as well, but for different reasons. I went to garage sales with my sister-in-law and we found some wonderful deals. One lady was selling all of her baby boy’s clothes for 6 outfits for a dollar! Though Jacob has more clothes than I do (and those that know me find that hard to believe) I couldn’t resist buying him more because they were such a great price. I’m the type of person who aims to not have to have him wear the same outfit twice. A little materialistic I know but that’s just who I am. These clothes were so cute and then I got some with matching hats and I can’t wait to put him in these things. We went to Goodwill, too and I bought a bunch of parenting books. I’m always interested to learn new methods and ideas in childcare and in raising children. Then if these deals weren’t enough, I went and picked up some free baby items from someone I found on freecycle.com. If you haven’t been to this website I highly recommend you go now… yes, I’m telling you to leave my page that is how much I love this website. To end the afternoon I had a crunchwrap from tacobell. I normally get the same thing each time I go but because of my 300 list I have decided to try new things.

I’m looking forward to tomorrow (or today considering it’s 12:14 in the morning) and all the great possibilities the day will bring.

July 31, 2008

I spent a whole day thinking about what I wanted to do in regards to my work situation. I weighed the pros and cons and looked into multiple different options. At first I was discouraged and worried but now I have comfort in knowing I’ve made the right choice for my family. What is that choice you ask? For now it’s a secret but you will know within the week.

Other than that large decision and a bunch of smaller ones that you don’t want to read about (ie. I am going to switch car insurance and what my cleaning schedule looks like) not much happened. I have decided that I am going to start another blog based on “home” related topics like organization and frugal living. This will be up within the next couple weeks and I will provide a link to it.

As for my goals, I am working hard to make sure I do something that is on my list at least a couple times a day. This list holds me responsible because when I update it every evening people can see if I am slacking or not. I’ve said this before but I highly recommend lists if you aren’t as productive as you would like to be.

July 30, 2008

For the past couple of years I had been living day to day with no purpose. I went to work but other than that I did not have a drive to really do anything. I stopped hanging out with friends, stopped pursuing activities that were important to me, and basically lost part of what made me who I was. I assumed that I had just “changed” and did not find these things important anymore. I have found out recently that yes, I’ve changed, but I still have a longing for parts of the old me back. What made me think about these things were various websites I’ve found online in the past few weeks that talk about goal setting, communication, organization, and topics of similar nature. I started thinking about what I wanted to accomplish in the next three years and realized that I had many of the same dreams as before. While writing my goals I realized that I could make them reality if I made a conscious effort to do so. So far I have completed a couple of small goals and started working towards bigger ones. Some of them are just for fun (ie. go out for ice cream), some are good for my health (ie. go to the gym), and some are vital to my wellbeing (ie. love myself). I am proud of myself for working to find the old me and changing myself for my new life as a mom.

July 29, 2008

After my family birthday party yesterday my little sister stayed over night and then spent the day with me today and leaves tomorrow morning. I am so happy that I’m getting to spend time with her one on one because we don’t get a chance to do this often. I just wish that I could have taken her somewhere more exciting than the downtown of a suburb. It was fun. We walked around and ate at Coldstone Creamery (the apple pie ice cream is so good there). Having little money, a one and a half month old and a 12 year old really limited the choices of where we could go. Hopefully in the next couple of years my financial situation will improve and I will be able to find places to go and things to do that are a little more fun. That is if I go back to work. S doesn’t want me to return to work because he wants me to be a stay at home mom. As previously mentioned I had wanted to be a stay at home mom before so this isn’t just a man demonstrating a 1950’s mentality on a woman’s role. I can’t imagine getting out to do much of anything if I stay home. I kind of like the idea of staying home and taking care of my son and sitting online while he is sleeping but another part of me tells me I need adult interaction and places to go and these things will be harder to find if I don’t return to work. I have to decide soon because my maternity leave is almost over. I guess I have been putting it off because it is a hard decision to make. For now I will move away from this topic because it’s late and it puts too many thoughts in my head that I know I will think about when I’m trying to fall asleep.

July 28, 2008

Happy Birthday to me! I thought a lot this morning about my past birthdays. I have had some good ones and some not so good ones but the one thing that they had in common was that they did not meet my expectations. That sounds so horrible to say but I don’t mean it in an “I didn’t get the gift I wanted” way. I honestly would be fine with a card or even no gift at all. What I mean is that each birthday I’ve had I’ve woken up thinking that it was going to be such a great day and everything was going to be perfect because, hey, it’s my birthday and it’s an important day. I think that I am selfish in thinking that because my birthday is important to me that it’s important to everyone else. I think this is why I get disappointed every July 28th. I just assume that everyone is going to find this particular day of the year as important as I find it. Every year it seems someone has forgotten my birthday or has better things to think about and do on this day. I think all I really want is everyone I love and care about to acknowledge that it’s my birthday. I don’t need a party. I don’t need gifts. I don’t need anything more than a “happy birthday” from the people I love. I guess I make it a point to say these two words to others, even if I can’t afford a gift or don’t have time for a celebration. I make sure to let the person know I’m thinking about them on this one day of the year. I guess my birthday is not over yet and they still have a little under two hours to let me know that they care enough to utter these two words but I’m assuming they are in bed and not thinking about me at this time. To all my family and friends that did wish me a “happy birthday”- thank you. You made my day so much better by uttering these two words (or in some cases, writing it). I am grateful for these people and hopeful that maybe next year everyone I love will love me back.

July 27, 2008

Since I have yet to decide if I can commit to writing in two blogs I am just going to write about everything in this one right now. I really want to do a separate blog for my life as a mom and then maybe one on a baby website for Jacob but I don’t know if I will have the energy or time to take those things on. I am still deciding what I’m going to do once my maternity leave is over. Sometimes I think that I’d like to be a stay at home mom and then other times I think that I might like to go back to work, even if only part-time. Anyways, about today… I took Jacob to a children’s waterpark with my mom, my sister in law, her mom, and my nephew. There was also a playground area and Jacob played in the sand for the first time. Ok, well really I just covered his feet with sand but that counts right? He was full of smiles so I think he had lots of fun. As far as the list goes, I wrote my very first thank you card from my baby shower. I’m a little late (it was at the beginning of April) but I figure better late then never. I also still need to do Jacob’s birth announcements from the beginning of June. I am such a procrasinator. Well, it’s now the 28th and it should be noted that I am now 25 years old. The past few years have flown by me yet it doesn’t seem like much has been accomplished. I worked, had a baby, spent time with family but other than that did a whole lot of nothing. I decided the other day that I am not going to let another few years go by without any great personal growth. By July 28, 2011 I will be a better me. But right now that means ending this post and getting some much needed sleep.

My list

I visited the site http://triplux.com/dayzero/ where they encourage people to do 101 goals in 1001 days. I liked the idea but I changed it a bit for myself because I wanted to include many small things in my list. I was wanting to start on Monday which is my 25th birthday but I started two of the items early. Here’s my list-

300 THINGS IN 3 YEARS

JUST FOR ME

  1. Keep a short-term to do list and complete items weekly
  2. Start a journal and journal at least every other day (0/548)
  3. Start a happy journal and identify 500 things that make me happy (0/500)
  4. Get a haircut every 3 months (0/12)
  5. Start and use a calendar
  6. Update my wardrobe with clothes that fit and I like
  7. Purchase wants: phone and videocamera
  8. Get a pedicure every other week in the summer (0/14)
  9. Have five “me” days a year (0/15)
  10. Write Avery a letter
  11. Make a list of 50 things I like about myself (0/50)
  12. Count clothing
  13. Find the perfect foundation in the right color
  14. Find great fitting jeans and buy them
  15. Dress up once a week even if I’m just staying home
  16. Get fitted for bras
  17. Find a ring I love and we can afford
  18. Get a facial
  19. Get eyebrows waxed
  20. Start tanning a few times a week
  21. Buy something for myself once a month
  22. Get a massage
  23. Spend money on five things I normally wouldn’t ie-peapod (0/5)
  24. Find acceptance in two private matters I’m struggling with
  25. Be more positive
  26. Be less critical of myself and others
  27. Be more patient
  28. Gossip less
  29. Love myself

HEALTH

  1. Lose 50 pounds
  2. Finish a 5k
  3. Go to the gym at least 3 times a week (0/468)
  4. Get my teeth fixed
  5. Go to 36 exercise classes (0/36)
  6. Keep track of my monthly cycle
  7. Drink one glass of water a day
  8. Take vitamins every day
  9. Do 100 push-ups (www.hundredpushups.com)
  10. Learn ten yoga poses (0/10)
  11. Go without caffeine for one week
  12. Develop a nightime routine and stick to it
  13. Go to dentist for cleaning twice a year (0/5)
  14. Find a primary care physician
  15. Go to eye doctor for a checkup
  16. Go to dermatologist to check moles
  17. Get a pap smear done once a year (0/2)

LOVE

  1. Plan wedding and get married
  2. Have another baby in 2009/2010
  3. Cook dinner ten times for Sinisa (0/10)
  4. Write a letter to Sinisa once a month (0/36)
  5. Take 20 walks with Sinisa (0/20)
  6. Watch the sunrise
  7. Watch the sunset
  8. Do two romantic things for Sinisa a month (0/72)
  9. Have a date day/night once a month (0/36)
  10. Take dance lessons with Sinisa
  11. Complete ‘1000 Questions to Ask Before you get Married’ book (0/1001)
  12. Have a fire in the fireplace twice a winter (0/6)
  13. Dance at home with Sinisa
  14. Go on a romantic picnic once a summer (0/3)
  15. Go stargazing
  16. Listen to 50 of Sinisa’s favorite songs (0/50)
  17. Go to pre-marital counseling
  18. Take a carriage ride
  19. Kiss Sinisa: at midnight on New Year’s Eve, in the rain, under water, under mistletoe
  20. Buy Sinisa something he’s been wanting once a month
  21. Have a candlelight dinner

JACOB

  1. Send birth announcements
  2. Write a letter to Jacob once a month (0/36)
  3. Read 1,000 books to Jacob (0/1000)
  4. Get professional pictures taken (0/19)
  5. Make all baby food unless traveling
  6. Take a photo of Jacob everyday
  7. Make and update monthly a growth chart for Jacob
  8. Complete baby book
  9. Order Jacob’s birth certificate
  10. Learn ten new songs to sing to Jacob
  11. Take Jacob to story time at the library
  12. Write Jacob’s birth story for his baby book
  13. Input list of Jacob’s “firsts” online and keep it updated
  14. Put snapfish pictures in group room
  15. Baby proof home
  16. Teach Jacob baby sign language
  17. Potty train Jake in 2009/2010
  18. Record 100 videos of Jacob and post online (0/100)

FAMILY

  1. Spend two days with each person in my immediate family (0/18)
  2. Visit with family once a week (0/156)
  3. Write a letter to 10 people who are important to me (0/10)
  4. Trace my family tree
  5. Contact each grandparent twice a year (0/30)
  6. Take a picture with ten people I love and write a paragraph about our relationship (0/10)
  7. Get a family picture taken twice a year (0/6)
  8. Send out Holiday cards and family updates each Christmas (0/3)
  9. Write thank-you’s for all gifts received

SOCIAL

  1. Visit with college friends two times (0/2)
  2. Have a girl’s day/night once every other month (0/18)
  3. Organize a “young parents” meetup
  4. Host five parties at my house (0/5)
  5. Get in touch with three people I’ve lost contact with (0/3)
  6. Call someone once a month that isn’t family (0/36)
  7. Make five new friends (0/5)
  8. Host a Holiday cookie exchange
  9. Go out to a bar with a friend
  10. Attend a meetup for each group I’m in
  11. Become active in Mom’s of Infants group-at least two activities a month
  12. Become active in Bolingbrook mom’s group-at least two activities a month
  13. Write notes to my friends telling them what they mean to me

HOUSEHOLD

  1. Make a cleaning schedule and stick to it
  2. Organize bedroom
  3. Clean out file cabinets and keep them organized
  4. Finish decorating the nursery
  5. Clean closet and maintain
  6. Clean bathroom and maintain
  7. Buy fresh flowers for the house twice a month (0/72)
  8. Purchase items for home: desk and entertainment center
  9. Back five times a year (0/15)
  10. Make my desk area more usable
  11. Clean out under bed
  12. Sanitize all Jacob’s toys
  13. Go through magazines and purge then keep only ten
  14. Frame and hang pictures on family
  15. Clean and organize laundry room
  16. Go through green laundry bag and hem/fix or take to cleaners
  17. Hang framed art
  18. Reupholster chairs
  19. Fix carpeting by bathrooms and kitchen
  20. Paint bathroom walls
  21. Clean out closet in Jacob’s room
  22. Clean out storage closet
  23. Repaint blue dresser
  24. Have maintenance fix door and blinds
  25. Organize family life binder

FINANCIAL

  1. Finish bankruptcy
  2. Establish a 3 month emergency fund
  3. Talk to family member about taking care of Jacob in case of our deaths
  4. Draft living will
  5. Pay off Saturn loan (0/10 payments)
  6. Open a saving’s account
  7. Save for a down payment and move into a rent-to-own house
  8. Develop and stick to a budget for 3 months
  9. Call SM loan and create payment plan
  10. Call GL loan and create payment plan
  11. Call CB loan and create payment plan
  12. Listen to Dave Ramsey’s financial CDs
  13. Sell five things on ebay (0/5)
  14. Purchase a new car
  15. Look into renter’s insurance
  16. Get current with all bills
  17. Check credit reports once a year (0/3)
  18. Pay movie store fines
  19. Change car insurance companies
  20. Keep track of spending and checking accounts

LEARNING

  1. Get an Associate’s Degree
  2. Learn 100 words/sayings in Croatian (2/100)
  3. Take a photography class
  4. Learn how to change a tire
  5. Attend three workshops (0/3)
  6. Learn the sign language alphabet (0/26)
  7. Learn how to use five different exercise machines at the gym
  8. Apply to University
  9. Read or watch at least two news stories a day
  10. Get college transcripts
  11. Watch a documentary
  12. Research bpd
  13. Learn 50 new abortion facts I didn’t know

CAREER

  1. Create a professional portfolio
  2. Write my resume
  3. Organize article file
  4. Find a flexible, well paying job

TRAVEL

  1. Plan and take a vacation
  2. Go to the beach five times (0/5)
  3. Go camping twice (0/2)
  4. Go to California
  5. Visit a state I’ve never been to
  6. Visit family in New York
  7. Visit family in Pennsylvania
  8. Go on a boat
  9. Visit a botanical garden
  10. Spend a day downtown each summer (0/3)
  11. Go to an orchard and pick apples
  12. Go to an amusement park
  13. Take a road trip
  14. Go to the zoo
  15. Go to a waterpark
  16. Go to a museum
  17. Go to Navy Pier
  18. Go skiing
  19. Stay somewhere overlooking the water

ENTERTAINMENT

  1. Erase songs on IPod that I don’t like
  2. Add songs to IPod monthly
  3. Create playlist on IPod for the gym
  4. See 25 movies I’ve never seen before
  5. Make a top 10 list of movies and songs
  6. Attend one concert a year (0/3)
  7. Attend 10 festivals (0/10)
  8. Go to a drive-in movie
  9. Spend a day watching a tv show marathon
  10. Go to a taping of the Oprah show
  11. See Blue Man Group

WRITING/READING

  1. Read all Nora Roberts books I own
  2. Start an online blog
  3. Read 50 parenting books
  4. Write a children’s book
  5. Catalog all books and organize them
  6. Write 10 reviews of places or services (www.lilaguide.com or www.yelp.com) (0/10)
  7. Participate in NaNoWrimo
  8. Write the book that’s been in my mind for years but first talk to HER about it
  9. Read 20 relationship books
  10. Subscribe to two magazines (0/2)
  11. Publish an article online or in print
  12. Try to get Morgan’s story published
  13. Publish something I’ve created through lulu.com
  14. Join a book club and read at least one book with them

CREATIVE ENDEAVORS

  1. Setup a scrapbooking area
  2. Create scrapbooks for Jacob’s first 3 years
  3. Create scrapbook for my relationship with Sinisa
  4. Create scrapbook of college years
  5. Join and sing in a choir
  6. Make Jacob five things including: ABC book, teddy bear, family photo album
  7. Be an extra in a movie or tv show
  8. Organize pictures
  9. Audition for something
  10. Do a project from cutoutandkeep.net
  11. Take at least five pictures from each event I go to
  12. Relearn how to crochet
  13. Do Live Journal’s “A Day in My Life” photography project

GIVING BACK

  1. Volunteer 20 days of my time (0/20)
  2. Give away 100 items (0/100)
  3. Give blood once a year (0/3)
  4. Do 50 random acts of kindness (0/50)
  5. Tell a manager when I get good service
  6. Attend a pro-life event
  7. Become a CASA (court appointed special advocate)
  8. Participate in Holiday gift tree for a needy child
  9. Write a letter to a politician about abortion
  10. Release five books through bookcrossing.com (0/5)
  11. Use reusable shopping bags for small trips to the grocery store
  12. Replace light bulbs with energy efficient ones as they go out
  13. Look into recycling and start recycling cans
  14. Donate 50,000 grains of rice through freerice.com
  15. Anonymously pay for five strangers coffees or food (0/5)
  16. Re-sign up to be an organ donor
  17. Complete two March of Dimes Walks (0/2)
  18. Go through clothes and give away what I don’t want

SPIRITUAL

  1. Read the whole Bible
  2. Tithe weekly (0/156)
  3. Find a church home
  4. Do devotions every day for a month (0/30)

FUN

  1. Watch fireworks live
  2. Go to a parade
  3. Drive around looking at Christmas lights and drinking hot cocoa
  4. Go mini-golfing
  5. Walk along the lakefront
  6. Decorate Easter eggs
  7. Play in the rain
  8. Go down a waterslide
  9. Shop at a Farmer’s Market
  10. Go bowling
  11. Make smores
  12. Draw with chalk on the sidewalk
  13. Go sledding
  14. Try 15 foods I’ve never tasted before
  15. Build a snowman
  16. Finish a 1000 piece puzzle
  17. Complete a Suduko book
  18. Mail a secret to postsecret
  19. Color in a coloring book
  20. Go swimming
  21. Play a board game
  22. Fly a kite
  23. Achieve a 30% winning percentage in solitaire
  24. Complete a crossword puzzle on my own
  25. Go horseback riding
  26. Plant flowers
  27. Race a go-kart
  28. Play laser tag
  29. Go pumpkin picking and carve the pumpkin
  30. Shop at a thrift store other than Goodwill
  31. Buy a lottery ticket
  32. Visit five new restaurants (0/5)
  33. Send out a message in a bottle
  34. Go out for ice cream
  35. Go to a sporting event
  36. Get a typing speed of 100wpm at typeracer.com
  37. Register $5 at wheresGeorge.com

ONLINE/COMPUTER

  1. Create and maintain a list of favorite websites
  2. Create and maintain a list of my online profiles
  3. Clean off computer hard drive
  4. Empty email inbox and keep it empty
  5. Setup google applications
  6. Organize pictures on the computer
  7. Add pictures to flickr account
  8. Update all online profiles
  9. Start a blog and blog at least twice a week

JUST BECAUSE I NEED TO

  1. Wash car inside and out twice a year (0/6)
  2. Get oil changed four times a year (0/12)
  3. Renew license plates (0/2)
  4. Update address book
  5. Get a new passport
  6. Get a new license